lol @ everyone glorifying 2016.
but ok fine, THEN LOOK AT MY PICS TOO.
When you think about it, calling any year the ‘worst year ever’ implies a certain optimism. Subtext: surely things can’t get any worse. And in that respect, I am nostalgic for my 2016 naiveté.
For me though, 2016 was the worst.
Two plus weeks into the year, my dad died. It was the greatest personal loss I had ever experienced.
(Maybe I’ll do another post chronicling the fever dream that was my grief week—that week between the funeral and going back to work. Truly, fellow dead parent club members: like, what were you doing the following Tuesday?)
Enter a few personal highs and lows in the months between then and November 8, and well, all of a sudden my micro grief felt MACRO. This was now the worst year ever for all of us, right?!
Wrong (at least according to my social media feed right now where all of my peers want you to know that the truest joy they’ve ever felt happened in a valencia filter and a cool leather jacket).
As it turns out, 2016 was just the beginning of a downtrend. Then there was 2017, 2018, 2019, and my god 2020(!), and well, 2026 (and 2023, 2024, and 2025—TO NAME A FEW).
But people did not like 2016 in 2016!
TRUST ME. I REMEMBER.
In fact, I remember this specifically because of the comfort it brought me—like the world was cosigning and sharing just a little bit of my grief (followed of course by competitiveness, ‘yea, but like, did your dad die? No? Aw, that’s OK sweetie 💅’).
So now, as my FYP is a continuous flow of TikTok Shop ads for crank radios, faraday cages, brass knuckles (imagine tho? like,,,me???), water-filter straws, and the occasional ‘we’re looking for 14 women who want to disappear for 27 days and come back SMOKIN’ HOT🥵!’, I wonder how we’ll remember this moment in time.
And for however I feel right now [BAD!!], the truth is that I don’t know the answer to that question because I don’t know what’s coming.
Is this the last best day before something far worse? The rock bottom before things get better? Which mundane aspects of my current routine will I yearn for so deeply in a decade from now that I force you all to look through the pictures?
So - alas - here’s what I saved in my very culled down camera roll from 2016. In photos, my year looks uneventful. It’s mainly crying selfies, cat selfies, crying selfies with my cat, good makeup selfies, bad makeup selfies.
And yet 2016 felt pivotal for me. I lost a parent. I left a dead-end job. I started a new [dead-end—but we couldn’t have known, Emma!!] job. I started doing standup. I cut out bad friendships. I strengthened good ones. I got closer with my family. I traveled. I dated. I performed. I felt A LOT. I did A LOT. It was A LOT.
It was the ______ of times.
So now, my pain is your pleasure. Here is my 2016 in 11 photos.
Enjoy.
1. ME IN A DIAPER. (yeah you didn’t think it would start like this, did you?!)
My friend Eric was on his way to my apartment to sit shiva and texted me asking what he could bring. I told him I was too tired to use the bathroom (this was a lie), and asked him to buy me adult diapers. He did it no questions asked (angel!), and then I had my mom answer the door and specifically ask him what was in the bag so he’d be forced to reveal his shiva contribution: Depend Fresh Protection (bagels around the world are shaking in their boots rn).
2. A CRIME COMMITTED BY A PROFESSIONAL MUA.
Is this not the ugliest makeup you’ve ever seen? I asked for soft neutrals for work headshots. (canceled the headshots and went home and cried. See below.)
3. SEE ABOVE. (before there was Violet, there was Sarah. 🐱 She was my Dad’s cat <3)
4. STELLA GOT HER GROOVE BACK!
I get knocked down, but I get up again! I did my own makeup and instead of getting LinkedIn headshots, I accidentally took solo engagement pics! (literally at the engagement spot in Dumbo.) I DO!!
5. TOOK EDIBLES WITH MY MOM.
We ate candy in front the TV for an hour before we realized we were staring at an HDMI screen.
6. OOPS, CRIED AGAIN.
this will be a recurring theme throughout the year(sssss).
7. Convinced myself my dad was reincarnated as this pumpkin Halloween decoration.
You kinda see it though right?
8. Went to Japan with my mom, and my best friend who was living abroad in Shanghai at the time, met us there.
This trip filled my cup. That friend will be having her second baby any day now <3
9. ummm…
Tried my first and last crossfit class. Forgot I had freewill and ended up in a group photo on the studio’s Instagram (flexing nonetheless). Haunting.
10. STARTED DOING STANDUP.
Nothing like a comedy club bringer show. IYKYK.
11. EARNESTLY WENT OUT (prob to Los Feliz) WITH A FAKE TATTOO ON MY ARM.
~My dad died and all I got was this temporary tattoo of a culinary torch.~
I didn’t love 2016, but I love 2016 Emma. And 2016 Emma would love that YOU are reading this. (And she’d hate that 2026 Emma is referring to either of them in the third person. And 2026 Emma would… just kidding, I’m done.)
As you know Emma my 2025 mirrors your 2016 in terms of joining the dead parent (dad) club. It’s a club that sucks and I want out. It’s truly the worst thing that has ever happened to me but it makes me all the more appreciative of finding things that give me joy like your podcast and Smell Club. Thank you for sharing. Also fuck cancer
Emma I laughed all the way through this article, thank you for the comic relief. 🩷😅
Grief is hard and doesn't have a timeline. But in this case pinpointing it to a year and with pictures, chef's kiss.😘🗓️
2016 was horrendous for a lot of other reasons that we are still dealing with every effing day. Enough said. 😢